Thursday, October 10, 2013

USMC Tuition Assistance Program during the Government Shutdown

Here is the current information on the USMC Tuition Assistance Program during the Government Shutdown.  The information is provided by the MCB Hawaii Education Center Kaneohe Bay, HI

(1) TA is still suspended.  TA will not return until Congress & the President agree on either a continuing resolution (CR) or budget to fund the government.  No CR/budget means that no money has yet been appropriated to fund the FY14 TA budget.


(2) The USMC cannot make a promise to pay.

(3) In no case will TA be paid retroactively.  For example, if a CR is passed this Friday, 11 OCT, TA will only fund courses that begin on or after Friday.

(4) If your Marine is scheduled to take a class, they should talk to their school immediately re: payment options.

(5) If the course starts prior to the passage of a CR/budget, please remind your Marine to cancel their TA Application via the Education Center.  Marine will also have to disenroll from the course, or they will owe out-of-pocket money to their school.

(6) The Education Center is assisting your Marines through education planning & counseling, including identifying alternative sources of funding.  We encourage you to speak to your Marines re: the use of FAFSA, grants, scholarships and GI Bill (in lieu of TA).

(7) For alternative, non-traditional credit, please strongly encourage MCIs, CLEP/DSST exams (when they eventually return) & the Joint Services Transcript to supplement traditional academic credit.  Many free CLEP/DSST study materials are available at the Education Center (Bldg 220) & Library (Bldg 219).

Like you, we have no idea when this shutdown might end.  We encourage Marines to think outside the box re: ways to continue their academic studies without TA.  Our Education Specialists here at the Education Center can help them with that.  For example, Marines can go to Hickam on Mondays (0800-1200) and self-pay for CLEP & DSST exams.

MCB Hawaii Education Center
Kaneohe Bay, HI


- Website: http://mccshawaii.com/edcenter
- Facebook: www.facebook.com/jechawaii
- Feedback? http://ice.disa.mil/index.cfm?fa=card&sp=93217&s=340&dep=*DoD&sc=4

- FY14 TA: www.marines.mil/News/Messages/tabid/13074/Article/149668/tuition-assistance-ta-guidelines-update.aspx

"Tuition Assistance provides Marines the opportunity for scholarly and intellectual development, personal growth, and increased awareness and maturity. This benefits our Corps both on the battlefield and in garrison." - General James F. Amos, Commandant of the Marine Corps.

Friday, February 8, 2013

Sisters of St. Francis

A man is driving down a deserted stretch of highway when he notices a sign out of the corner of his eye...



It reads:

SISTERS OF ST. FRANCIS
HOUSE OF PROSTITUTION
10 MILES

He thinks this is a figment of his imagination and drives on without second thought....

Soon he sees another sign which reads:

SISTERS OF ST. FRANCIS
HOUSE OF PROSTITUTION
5 MILES

Suddenly he begins to realize that these signs are for real and drives past a third sign saying:

SISTERS OF ST. FRANCIS
HOUSE OF PROSTITUTION
NEXT RIGHT

His curiosity gets the best of him and he pulls into the drive. On the far side of the parking lot is a stone building with a small sign next to the door reading:

SISTERS OF ST. FRANCIS


He climbs the steps and rings the bell. The door is answered by a nun in a long black habit who asks,


'What may we do for you ! my son? '

He answers, 'I saw your signs along the highway and was interested in possibly doing business....'

'Very well my son. Please follow me.' He is led through many winding passages and is soon quite disoriented. The nun stops at a closed door and tells the man, 'Please knock on this door.'

He does so and another nun in a long habit, holding a tin cup answers the door... This nun instructs, 'Please place £100 in the cup then go through the large wooden door at the end of the hallway.'


He puts £100 in the cup, eagerly trots down the hall and slips through the door pulling it shut behind him.

The door locks, and he finds himself back in the parking lot facing another sign:

GO IN PEACE.
YOU HAVE JUST BEEN SCREWED BY THE SISTERS OF ST. FRANCIS.
SERVES YOU RIGHT, YOU SINNER

Thursday, November 29, 2012

Barbershop

A guy walks in to the Barbershop. 

Barber says, "What will it be today?" 

Guy says, "Well I want waves on top, faded on one side, plug the other, and just make it all out of shape and messed up." 

Barber says, "Now why in the world do you want your hair cut like that?"

Guy says, "That's how you cut it last time."

Why a Master Gunnery Sergeant's advice is so revered.:

(Of course this was sent by a Master Gunnery Sergeant... Cracked me up) 


A young Marine Officer was in a terrible car accident, but due to the heroics of the hospital staff, the only permanent injury was the loss of one ear. Since he wasn't physically impaired, he remained in the US Marine Corps and eventually rose to the rank of Colonel. However, during his career he was always sensitive about his appearance. 

 One day, the Colonel was interviewing a 1stSgt, a Sergeant Major and a Master Gunnery Sergeant to choose one of them to become his senior enlisted advisor. 

 The 1stSgt was interviewed first and it was deemed a great interview. At the end of the interview, the Colonel asked the 1stSgt, "Do you notice anything different about me?" The 1stSgt answered, "Why yes sir, I couldn't help but notice you are missing your right ear, so I didn’t know whether that impacted your hearing on that side, so I made it a point to talk to you from your left side." The Colonel got very angry at his lack of tact and threw him out of his office. 

 The next candidate was the Sergeant Major, and it was equally deemed a great interview. At the end of the Sergeant Major's interview, the Colonel asked the same question, "Do you notice anything different about me Sergeant Major?" The Sergeant Major answered, "Why no sir, I am just honored and privileged to be interviewed by you." The Colonel threw the Sergeant Major out of his office for lack of integrity and ass-kissing. 

 The third and final interview was with the Master Gunnery Sergeant. He was articulate and seemed to know more than the other two senior enlisted Marines, so the Colonel really wanted this guy and went ahead with the same question. "tell me Master Gunnery Sergeant, do you notice anything different about me?" To the Colonel's surprise, the Master Gunnery Sergeant answered, "Yes sir, I notice you wear contact lenses." The Colonel was so impressed and thought to himself, what an incredibly tactful Marine. "And how exactly would you know that, the Colonel asked? The Master Gunnery Sergeant replied, "Well sir, it's pretty damn hard to wear glasses with only one fucking ear." 

 GOTTA LOVE THE MASTER GUNS!

Sunday, November 18, 2012

Active Shooter Video

This post is a far cry from the "Jokes" category. Active Shootings are a serious threat. The events are random and unpredictable... This video offers tips on what to do should you find yourself in an active shooting situation.
RUN. HIDE. FIGHT

 
Click here for an Active Shooter Pocket Card

1. EVACUATE 
• Have an escape route and plan in mind 
• Leave your belongings behind 
• Keep your hands visible 

2. HIDE OUT 
• Hide in an area out of the shooter’s view 
• Block entry to your hiding place and lockthe doors 
• Silence your cell phone and/or pager 

3. TAKE ACTION 
• As a last resort and only when your life is in imminent danger 
• Attempt to incapacitate the shooter 
• Act with physical aggression and throw items at the active shooter

Saturday, November 17, 2012

Muhammed Ali knocks out Tony Romo

Not everyone is a Dallas Cowboys fan! I especially am not. Someone sent me this picture of Muhammed Ali knocking out Tony Romo. Brilliant~

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Soda Machine Ice Cube Maker

You need ice cubes when you get a soft drink, right? "Ice Cube"... C'mon, it's funny~

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Thursday, March 8, 2012

Non-Inspirational Posters

Some funny, some stupid, some just outright wrong.
My fav is the "Female Gamers"~


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Farm Kid joins the Marines

A West Virginia FARM KID joined the Marines (NOW AT San Diego MARINE CORPS RECRUIT TRAINING)


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Dear Ma and Pa,
I am well. Hope you are. Tell Brother Walt and Brother Elmer the Marine Corps beats working for old man Minch by a mile. Tell them to join up quick before all of the places are filled.

I was restless at first because you get to stay in bed till nearly 6 a.m. But I am getting so I like to sleep late. Tell Walt and Elmer all you do before breakfast is smooth your cot, and shine some things. No hogs to slop, feed to pitch, mash to mix, wood to split, fire to lay. Practically nothing.

Men got to shave but it is not so bad, there's warm water.

Breakfast is strong on trimmings like fruit juice, cereal, eggs, bacon, etc., but kind of weak on chops, potatoes, ham, steak, fried eggplant, pie and other regular food, but tell Walt and Elmer you can always sit by the city boys that live on coffee. Their food, plus yours, holds you until noon when you get fed again. It's no wonder these city boys can't walk much.

We go on 'route marches,' which the platoon sergeant says are long walks to harden us. If he thinks so, it's not my place to tell him different. A 'route march' is about as far as to our mailbox at home. Then the city guys get sore feet and we all ride back in trucks.

The sergeant is like a school teacher. He nags a lot. The Captain is like the school board. Majors and colonels just ride around and frown. They don't bother you none.

This next will kill Walt and Elmer with laughing. I keep getting medals for shooting. I don't know why. The bulls-eye is near as big as a chipmunk head and don't move, and it ain't shooting at you like the Higgett boys at home. All you got to do is lie there all comfortable and hit it. You don't even load your own cartridges. They come in boxes.

Then we have what they call hand-to-hand combat training. You get to wrestle with them city boys. I have to be real careful though, they break real easy. It ain't like fighting with that ole bull at home. I'm about the best they got in this except for that Tug Jordan from over in Silver Lake .. I only beat him once. He joined up the same time as me, but I'm only 5'6' and 130 pounds and he's 6'8' and near 300 pounds dry.

Be sure to tell Walt and Elmer to hurry and join before other fellers get onto this setup and come stampeding in.

Your loving daughter,
Alice

Monday, December 26, 2011

At The Doctor's Office

A man went to the doctor's office to get a double dose of Viagra.

The doctor told him that he couldn't allow him a double dose.


"Why not?" asked the man.

Because it's not safe," replied the doctor.


"But I need it really bad," said the man.

"Well, why do you need it so badly?" asked the doctor.

The man said, "My girlfriend is coming into town on Friday; my ex-wife will be here on Saturday; and my wife is coming home on Sunday. Can't you see? I must have a double dose."

The doctor finally relented saying, "Okay, I'll
give it to you, but you have to come in on Monday morning so that I can
check you to see if there are any side effects."


On Monday, the man dragged himself in; his right arm in a sling.

The doctor asked, "What happened to you?"

The man said, "No one showed up".

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